One Teen's Resolve

Introduction

Identity is proven not by our own understanding of ourselves but by how others perceive and describe us. Teenagers especially struggle with knowing who they are and what they believe, yet this struggle belongs to all of us. Two critical lessons emerge from Joseph’s story: temptations will come, and without understanding who we are, we will give in to them; and God is constantly at work on our behalf. These truths are especially important for teens to hear, but they matter equally for us all.

The Story

Joseph is Jacob’s favorite son. His brothers know it, jealousy reigns, and they sell him into slavery. From the comfort of Canaan, Joseph makes a long journey into Egypt, where Potiphar, one of Pharaoh’s officials and captain of the guard, purchases him. Yet look at verse 2: the Lord was with Joseph and he prospered.

We naturally ask: Where was God when Joseph’s brothers threw him into a pit intending to kill him? Where was God when the Ishmaelites came and his brothers sold him into slavery? What comfort is it to read that God was with him in Egypt? Why didn’t God stop the slavery before it happened? We misunderstand God’s work. God does not step in and override human will. If Joseph’s brothers want to kill him, they can. If they want to sell him into slavery, God allows it. We blame God for the actions of human beings because we think God ought to do what we want him to do—that he exists at our beck and call to make our lives comfortable. If we began thinking about God in more biblical ways, perhaps we would stop blaming him for the bad things that happen to us.

Joseph’s story never shows him blaming God for his misfortune. The Bible tells us that God was with Joseph. While God will not override human will, he blesses even in bad times. This is what happens with Joseph. This young man comes into a stranger’s house and soon becomes manager of his master’s entire household. And when Joseph becomes the manager of Potiphar’s household, God blesses Potiphar too. Before Jesus ever said we are salt and light, Joseph was salt and light in an unbeliever’s home. Everything prospered—Joseph, Potiphar, and the servants. Everything flourished.

But Potiphar is not alone in appreciating Joseph. Mrs. Potiphar likes Joseph too. A lot. She is drawn to him. He is handsome, muscular, lean, and forbidden. She makes Joseph an offer that would entice any young man: come to bed with me. No strings attached. Nothing but sex. No one will know. No one will find out. Just pleasure. For most teenage boys, this would be quite a temptation. In the Spring 2002 issue of Context, a journal published by the American Sociological Society, two researchers published new information. Surveying over ten thousand teens across America, they found that for teens aged 15 to 17, the number who had engaged in sexual relations fell from 54.1 percent in 1991 to 48.6 percent in 1997. That is great news. But they also discovered something that confirms the importance of Joseph’s refusal. While fewer teens are having sex, those who do are waiting for permission from the girlfriend. When the girl gives permission, sex ensues. You can call it a double standard or anything else you want, but the truth is that giving permission for sexual relations is difficult for teenage boys to turn down. So when Mrs. Potiphar says it is okay, Joseph faces a real temptation.

Look at the reason he gives for saying no. He is trusted by his master and holds a very responsible position that he will not jeopardize. She is a married woman, and what she suggests is wrong. He would sin against God. Five pretty good reasons to say no. But like any temptation, the first no is rejected. Verse 10 says Mrs. Potiphar spoke to Joseph day after day. She wooed him, spoke enticingly to him, taunted, tantalized, and titillated. Joseph continued to say no. Then came the day when Mrs. Potiphar would not accept rejection. The only way Joseph could escape was by running out of the house in his underwear. Unused to being rejected, Mrs. Potiphar concocted a story about attempted rape and slandered Joseph’s good name and reputation. Potiphar had little choice but to throw him into prison. Yet notice that he did not have Joseph killed, suggesting perhaps a little doubt in his mind about his wife’s story.

Application

So where is God now? We expect something good to happen to Joseph. We want a young man who stands up for what is right to be rewarded with more blessings. Instead, he finds himself in jail. So where is God? Why didn’t God set things straight? Because God does not intervene in human will. But neither does God quit working. Look at verses 20 and 21: while Joseph was in prison, the Lord was with him. God’s promise is not to save us from every uncomfortable situation, though he may save us from some. His promise is to never leave us. His promise is to be at work while things are falling apart. Joseph may be in prison, but he is not alone. We need to change the way we think about God and how he operates in this world.

What Joseph understood is who he was in relationship with God. He would follow God even if it cost him. And it did cost him. But his relationship with God allowed him to say no to a very intense temptation. This integrity is tested in difficult situations. Every one of us has the opportunity to say yes to temptation. Notice what Joseph did not say. He didn’t say “I might get AIDS!” He didn’t say “You might become pregnant!” He didn’t say “Your husband might kill me!” He didn’t say “I don’t find you attractive.” Any of these responses has nothing to do with obedience to the Holy One of Israel and integrity before him; any one of these is mere self-interest.

Our world does not understand this type of integrity. Our world sees things very differently. It is expected that young men and women cannot control their urges and that it is only a matter of time before they give in. Boys will be boys, we are told. We have the pill today. We must practice safe sex. All messages from today. Do not think for a moment that Joseph was not fully male. Do not think that Joseph felt nothing. Do not think that sexual temptation is a twenty-first-century phenomenon. We need young men and women who will take a godly stand in this world and say “How could I do such a wicked thing and sin against God?” But it is not just young people. We need godly men and women who know who they are in relationship with God and say no to temptation and sin.

Remember what John said in 1 John 4:4: “the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.” We do not have to give in to temptation. If we know who we are in relationship with God, we can say no to temptation. And if you belong to Jesus, your life is much more valuable than a fleeting moment of sin. God says you are salt and light. Joseph was that in Potiphar’s household. We are that in God’s world. But God will not interrupt your will. God wants you to say no, but when we don’t, he forgives when we repent and confess our sin.

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