God's Desire for Sexual Union

Introduction

A. When it comes to sexual matters the Bible is not silent. There are numerous texts which speak about sex. Nor is the Bible without graphic language to speak of the subject. While we may shy away from such, God did not. This says something about our God. There is in fact an entire writing which describes the love between spouses. The Song of Solomon or Song of Songs is that writing. I was about 12 when I first discovered this writing. I thought someone must have made a mistake including such.

B. Some of the ancients were so concerned about this writing that they tried to explain it away. Jewish scholars have long regarded Song of Songs as an allegorical description of the relationship between God and Israel. Some Christian scholars described the writing as an allegory describing the relationship between Christ and the church. Origen who lived around 250 A.D. thought the “two breasts” in 4:5 were the Old and New Testaments. All the attempts to explain the writing avoid the obvious. Avoiding the obvious says something about one’s discomfort with the subject matter.

C. The writing is quite explicit in places. From 1:2, the woman cries out for her husband to kiss her and is quickly followed by her pleas to go to the bed chamber. Yes, pleas! Then the husband in chapter 4 describes his wife. He begins with her eyes and works his way down. In what appears humorous to us is 4:2. “Your teeth are like a flock of sheep just shorn, coming up from the washing. Each has its own twin; not one of them is alone.” He says her teeth and white and shiny and that she has them all. While we may take dentistry for granted such was admired in Solomon’s day. And then in 8:3, the writer speaking for the woman says “His left arm is under my head and his right arm embraces me.” This further reveals the sexual nature of this writing.

D. Understanding the intent of the writing changes the way we can think about some of our hymnals. “He’s the Lily of the Valley” --- a song from my youth but one we do not sing any longer is taken from Song of Songs 2:1. So is the song “Jesus, Rose of Sharon.” The phrase “rose of Sharon” is also found in 2:1. So those songs take the allegorical view of the text and use it to describe Jesus. Both of those phrases are used by the woman to describe herself. If God uses his writers to speak so freely about such an intimate matter, perhaps we should move beyond embarrassment to understanding something about our God.

E. My contention today and next week is this — God created sex. Since he created sex, then the very act of sexual intercourse says something about God. This is what a theology of sex is designed to do — help us understand God better.

F. Theology

1. I am indebted to Tim Gardner and his book on Sacred Sex for much of this material. He gave pen and ink to thoughts I have had for a long time. Theology denotes a study about God. To think and study God from the aspect of sex is not often done or thought about. There is something within us that finds that perhaps odd at best and blasphemous at worst. But it is neither. We can look at all kinds of things and try to discover the nature of God inherent within that studied thing. This is the intent of theology. Creation reveals God. Our sense of right and wrong reveals God. Our demands of justice reveals God. Paul notes that God is revealed in our world and we can know him by paying attention to our world.

A. So it is with sex. This very intimate act reveals God. And there are texts in which God intentionally reveals himself through this very intimate act. Last week we noted that sexual immorality ignores the holiness of God. God's call to holiness is for us to reveal him through our actions. Just as sexual immorality demonstrates a lack of holiness so sexual intimacy within marriage reveals the holiness of God.

Texts

A. God created sex. In Genesis 2, we have God ending the man’s loneliness by creating and bringing a woman to him. She was his gift. The man was the woman’s gift. In verse 24, God emphasizes his intent for all time — man and woman together forming a marriage covenant. Two becoming one flesh.

B. Let’s stop here and make the implied obvious. God created sex. This speaks of intent and purpose. How do we know this? God always creates with purpose. Sky, sea, sun, animals, plants, all are created with purpose at God’s spoken word according to chapter 1. Why would sex be any different? To say otherwise is to say that God didn’t know what he was doing when he created our bodies. From a biological point of view, we know that God creates with purpose because he made our bodies with more nerve endings in the sexual regions than any other part of our body. This tells us something about our God.

C. We looked at this text several weeks ago in a different context, but the point we made then is still valid. The words “leave” and “united” are found in other texts and both are used to describe a covenant. This is covenant language. Marriage is a covenant. The “one flesh” is an indication of covenant. In other words, to engage in sexual intercourse outside of marriage does not make one married. But the act of sex brings oneness. Paul acknowledged this point in 1 Corinthians 6:16 that uniting with one who is not your spouse makes you one body. He does not say it makes you married, but the oneness cannot be set aside. Sex intercourse makes two one.

D. This is another reason why sexual immorality goes against God’s purpose. Oneness had its beginning and expressed purpose in marriage. From this text in Genesis 2 we discover two things — marriage is God’s gift; acceptance is the gift that couple give to each other. In 2:25, the Bible tells us that both were naked and felt no shame. Without sin there was no shame. When sin comes, the first thing the couple does is hide their nakedness from each other. Thus, the acceptance of each other is one of the great gifts that we give to each other especially sexually. This statement comes immediately after the intent of oneness. Sexual union within marriage honors God. How? By using our bodies as God intended. Such reveals God’s holiness.

E. Sex also reveals something about God’s spiritual intent. We will develop this point more next week, but turn to Ephesians 5. Paul is discussing the mutual submission within the relationship of husband and wife. And in the midst of that discussion he quotes Genesis 2:24 and makes the point that the marriage relationship is in fact a demonstration of the relationship between Christ and the church. Paul could have made that point without quoting Genesis 2. But by doing so, he expressed a truth — the sexual relationship within marriage is a physical expression of the spiritual intimacy between Christ and the church. We will pick up with this thought next week.

Application

A. First, sex is an expression of covenant. A covenant requires two parts — words and actions. This is the reason why engaging in sexual behaviors outside of marriage doesn’t make one married. There are no words, vows, or promises. But when the words are spoken then actions are needed to demonstrate that covenant. The sexual relationship is one part of that covenant. God used covenant language in Genesis 2 to make that point. Covenant are not easily broken and covenants are celebrated. Sex is that celebration.

B. Second, our God created sex. Sex is therefore good. It is the abuse or misuse of sex which brings sin. When we use our bodies as God intended he is pleased. Sexual intimacy demonstrates God’s holiness. The gift of acceptance with your spouse allows the fullness of God’s expressed creative design to be shared. We live in a Barbie and Ken world. The media does nothing if not endorse the idea that perfectly formed bodies is the goal and the one who fails in achieving the goal is missing out. This places our body completely in the physical realm. This was not God’s intent. Acceptance has to do with a spiritual truth. God accepts us through the blood of his son Jesus. That kind of acceptance is rehearsed over and over in relationship and in the marriage relationship is where it can be practiced more fully.

1. Acceptance means to be positive toward your spouse; to avoid critical language which tears down and speaks of rejection.

2. Acceptance means to treat one another with respect through actions and words that your spouse is of great value and worth.

3. Acceptance means being ready to forgive when your spouse sins against you.

4. Acceptance means being naked and without shame.

5. Invitation.

Follow Jesus

If you’d like to respond to this message or learn more about following Jesus, please reach out.