God's Desire for Parents

Introduction

A. Raising children is not an easy task. There are always plenty of folks willing to give you advice, but advice usually comes out of personal experience and every child is different. What works in one family may not work in another. Many say that we need to turn to scripture to discover how to raise children. This is true. There are numerous texts that talk about raising children and how to do that. But those texts are not guarantees of success. The truth is that parents can love, discipline, and encourage and children do not turn out well.

B. So I want to begin with the ending. Raising children is not easy; it takes prayer, time, effort, and more prayer. And then it takes allowing our children to leave us and make decisions and then we marvel at those decisions or we are perplexed by them or we say in our heads or out loud “where in the world did that come from” and we pray some more. Children make their own decisions and we parents are too often left to deal with the shame and embarrassment of their decisions. So let us begin this morning with this truth—raising kids is not easy. I cannot change that truth. What we can do is learn how to raise children using God’s word and commit ourselves to prayer for our children.

C. Today as we share in God’s word, may we be reminded that our heavenly Father loves us as a good father and gives us good gifts from above. Let’s express our thanks for his goodness.

Loving God

A. Next Sunday, we will look at God’s Desire for Mothers and the following week God’s Desire for Fathers. This lesson serves as a springboard for both lessons to follow. Deuteronomy 6 is a familiar text. One that has been used for sermon material about raising children over and over again. Let’s look at the text and then make some application. Moses is giving final instructions to the people before they cross the Jordan River to enter into the land promised to them. These instructions are not new; they were first given at Mount Sinai but as you will recall, the faithlessness of God’s people resulted in 40 years of wandering in the desert. Thus, Deuteronomy serves as a reminder about God’s desire for them as they now approach their final destination.

B. Early on there is a reminder of the giving of the law at Sinai in chapter 5. As we begin chapter 6 “These are the commands, decrees and laws” is a reflection on chapter 5. And Moses is very specific—this teaching is here so that their children and grandchildren would keep the commands in order to enjoy a long life. God’s expectations are for this generation who are hearing the laws and commands to pass them on to their children and grandchildren. Doing so would bring God’s favor.

C. Beginning in verse 4 is the section that Jewish people to this day focus on as one of the main texts of scripture. This text was so important that faithful Jews repeat this text twice a day to remind them of the truth about God and their response to him. “Hear, O Israel: the Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.”

1. With all you heart—with your intellect, your thoughts

2. With all your soul—with that which is you but is not physical; your will

3. With all your strength—with that which is physical

4. In other words, with all parts of your being and person. With everything that is you.

D. And in verse 7, Moses says that these commands are to be impressed upon your children. Parents are to teach these commands to their children. They are to be decisive in their teaching and are to strongly urge their children to learn these commands. The word that is used here can be used to describe something that is pierced. God’s word is to pierce the heart of the child through the instruction of the parent.

E. Moses goes on to say that this teaching is to take place throughout the day and at any and all occasions.

1. When you sit at home—at rest

2. When you walk along the road—while in the car

3. When you lie down—when you go to bed

4. When you get up—at the breakfast table.

5. Tie them on your hands and on your foreheads—Some take this literally and thus actually tie containers holding bits of scripture on their hands and foreheads as well as on the door frames of their houses. But the idea is a continuation of the previous.

6. The point is not specific times; it is every day; all day; at every opportunity and every day has numerous opportunities.

Application

A. So what does this tell us as parents about raising our children. First, it has to be done intentionally. We have to think about our children daily. We have to pray for them daily. We have to set aside our selfish desires in order to instruct our children. Practically speaking:

1. Turn down or turn off the radio or CD in the car and let conversation flow.

2. Have dinner together at a table rather than in front of the TV.

3. Pray with your child when they go to bed.

4. Pray with your child before they leave the house for the day.

5. Use God’s name appropriately in front of the children.

6. Refuse to allow setbacks and challenges to keep you from praising God.

7. Make sure that your children’s friends are welcome in your home so they too can be prayed for and encouraged.

B. This intentionality comes from a holy source. This whole series combines the idea of family with the holiness of God. Look at Deuteronomy 6 again. The context of chapter 6 begins in chapter 5. Moses rehearses the events of Mt. Sinai. He reminds them of the 10 Commandments that had come to them. Look at 5:22. These commandments came from God’s loud voice out of the fire, out of the cloud and the darkness with the mountain ablaze with fire.

1. Notice verse 24. The Lord has shown us his glory and his majesty … but we will die if we hear the voice of the Lord again. They feared the glory of God. It was too terrible to look at. It was sheer grace that they were not killed in his presence. They feared that continuing to hear the voice of God and to see his glory would result in their deaths. And so they begged Moses to be their liaison.

2. Notice verse 28 & 29. The Lord spoke directly to Moses and said he had heard everything that had been said. “Oh, that their hearts would be inclined to fear me and keep all my commands always, so that it might go well with them and their children forever!”

3. This is the context for chapter 6. It is that the glory of the Lord; the holiness of God had been seen. Having been seen, the parents are so overwhelmed that they pass it on to their children and their grandchildren.

C. This is what drives us as parents. That we see the glory of the Lord. When we are convinced about the God who has spoken to us through his Son, Jesus, then we share what we revere. When we are convinced about the God we serve; when we have seen his glory; when we know the holiness of God, then we raise our children. As we have been pierced by the holy glory of God so we pierce the heart of our children.

D. But there are no guarantees. Godly parents sometimes have ungodly children. Parents whose hearts have been pierced by the glory of God often have their hearts ripped apart by children who live in ways that denies God’s glory. Parents try to reveal God’s glory to their children and when children take hold of it we say, “the parents did well” and when children do not take hold of it we say “the parents should have done more.” Imperfect parents raise imperfect children. When my children do the right things they make me look good.

1. Parents who try to raise godly children must no longer take credit for the good nor hold on to the embarrassment of our child’s poor decisions.

2. I came across something that I will not read completely but which makes this point well.

I gave you life, but I cannot live it for you. I can teach you things, but I cannot make you learn. I can give you directions, but I cannot always be there to lead you. I can allow you freedom, but I cannot account for it. I can take you to church, but I cannot make you believe. I can teach you right from wrong, but I can’t always decide for you.

I can love you as a daughter or son, but I cannot place you in God’s Family. I can pray for you, but I cannot make you walk with God. I can teach you about Jesus, but I cannot make HIM your Savior. I can teach you to OBEY, but I cannot make Jesus Your Lord. I can tell you how to live, but I cannot give you Eternal Life.

Parents, allow God’s glory to pierce your heart. Bring your passion to your children. Do what you can do with your imperfections and limitations. Pray for your children. Don’t give up on them. Give up the shame and embarrassment. May God release you. Let’s pray. Invitation.

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